The Writing Feeling

kissing

has kissed me…so, I’ve been writing a little. Oh sure, I’ve been scribbling notes here and there all along, but I haven’t really been doing what I consider writing-writing. Comparatively speaking, I wrote quite a bit last year. I wrote lots of stories stuffed with every emotion and then some. Some of those stories I submitted and some I didn’t. The point is, I was writing and that piece of me that feeds my soul was eating as if it were living with a gourmet chef.

As much as I love writing, it can be a slippery slope for me though. I say that only because the need to write is an endless demand of solitary time. Solitary time that’s necessary to create – consumed in one’s own thoughts. And oh how solitary time eats into other parts of my life. I don’t have the same free-time like I did just one year ago, so my time gets gobbled up and I feel more often than not, that I can’t lock myself into a reclusive state of what is being a writer, because…well, because of life.

I’m lucky to have rich things in my life: friends, family, love struggles, work struggles, and all kinds of responsibilities and none of those things really want to share their time with the writer in me. No one usually wants to play second fiddle to solitary writing time. And it’s not an issue of having selfish friends either. You have to nurture relationships or they won’t survive. And to be honest I want to nurture the people in my life that I love and care about. And I’m no different, I want that too. Everyone wants to feel special and important when it comes to those people we care about the most.

Oh, but wait…I can hear writing calling out to me in that low and seductive, bedroom voice…

Yeah, I know what you’re thinking: we all have to make choices. It’s a poetic balancing act, and all of us have the same struggles – we all have to make sacrifices sometimes. I know. I get it. As I start to let writing seduce me a little more, I’m curious, how do you create the time to do that one thing that truly feeds your soul without stepping into writing quick-sand? I mean doesn’t something in your life suffer because of your passion? Please, enlighten me while writing now nibbles at my left ear lobe….

Hungry, curious, and writing -
Neve Black

Get Down With Your Bad Self…

marilyn

…were the words inside the card I sent off to my mother this week – she turns 79 on Friday. Holy, it’s time to stop praying mom, and start shaking your sexy, groove thing and get down with your bad self!

This has been a tough week for me. I’m ridiculously busy at my boring-ass day job, I’ve met contractors every morning and night at my house, so I’m extra tired. What’s worse, I had to push back being a guest blogger for one of my favorite persons, Ashley Lister at OhGetAGrip. I’m sorry, Ash. Sniff-sniff.

I feel badly about missing that deadline too: badly because I hate disappointing people and badly because I’m honored when I’m invited to write, or speak and I can’t do it simply because of life’s pesky time constraints. Who would have thought I’d ever be irked over anything that had the word, contraint in it? But irked over constraints I am.

It been said that every rain cloud has a silver lining, and the thunder storm is about to clear, because there’s only two more days of hell left in this week, and then it’s Friday.

blacksheep

Speaking of hell, I’m not sure if my God fearing mother will let Satan in for her birthday, and really get down and get Neve-Black sheep of the family, dirty, if for just one very special day. But not to worry, I have no problem hanging out with Satan from time to time - he’s usually disguised as tequila *shrugs*.  And I’m hoping by Friday I’ll start feeling a little less irked about feeling contrained.

 

Baaaaaa
Neve Black

Love and Carrots

taste

This past Sunday marked the eighth annual Taste of Tremont street fair. I usually go for an hour or so; walk the couple blocks and mingle with friends while eating grazing at all the various kiosks from the local, yummy restaurants in town.

But this year’s Taste of Tremont was in celebration of our friend and local neon artist, Jeff Chiplis. Jeff was victim to a heineous crime about a month ago: Jeff was shot in the back after walking down to one of the local haunts during our monthly art walk.  Friends and neighbors were all shocked after learning the news. I was in KL when I found out – feeling helpless and sad. Fortunately, for all of us, Jeff survived and is recovering.

But the road to recovery takes awhile. Jeff is one of the lucky ones who earns his living as an artist. And he can’t really work right now. So, from donations and the help of loving friends and fellow artists, we all banned together as a community and asked for donations, while offering variations of carrot (jeff is also known as the Carrot King)  juice during the festivities this year. Our goal was to sell 500 cups of carrot juice. The team nearly doubled that goal and I feel overwhelmed with happiness knowing all the proceeds from each and every person’s efforts go to Jeff and his family. 

I have so much pride in my heart. Everyone worked so hard for something that was so good and so selfless. It’s nice to know that sometimes the darkest and ugliest times are filled with the shiniest and brightest stars:  love, compassion and hope.

 
 
 

 
Feeling  The Love
Neve Black

Hypatia

 

I went and saw the preview screening of the epic film, Agora this week. And the word, epic barely describes this 70 million dollar budgeted film – the cinematography is fantastic.

 

Agora tells the story about the rise of Christianity in 4th-century Alexandria. If you have an interest in philosophy, history, culture and well directed, acted and produced cinematic films, I recommend adding this film to your list of must sees. I will warn you though, it’s bloody…think Romans and Christians… and we all know what they did – yes, bloody.

 

The focus on this story was about the philosophical teachings of the woman philosopher, Hypatia, played by the very beautiful, and very talented, Rachel Weisz.

 

Historically speaking, pagan philosophers spent a lot time in Alexandria and even more particularly, the Alexandria Library, which was really more like a compound. These philosophers conducted teachings to students in things like, mathematics, physics, and astronomy, each leading to questioning the ways of world –

 

As religion took its hold over everything it possibly could, Hypatia was persecuted for being different; for never marrying and choosing to study her passion for philosophy. She was of course, persecuted for being un-Godly and in the end; she was rendered a witch and stoned to death. I told you this film was bloody, didn’t I?

 

In spite of the violence, the softer message in this film was Hypatia’s ability to go against the odds; to rise above the chaos and violence, because of what she believed in, even though it was different than what everyone else thought, or what everyone else told her to think.

 

For me, a non-follower, and a forever questioner of beliefs, I believe that a little bit of Hypatia lives in each of us today -

 

 


Feeling the spirit of Hypatia -

Neve Black

Tamo I Ovde

…or in English, Here and There…and what a simply delightful, feel-good film experience this film was:

hereandthere2

We meet our protaganists: Robert, a middle aged, burn-out, NYC saxophone player , who has essentially lost his soul, and we realize that he feels he has nothing to live for, when he meets a young, hopeful Serbian man, Branko, that has his own life struggles, but represents the antithesis of Robert- Branko is driven by hope and by love, thus has everything to live for.

The story pans between the streets of NYC and Belgrade, and the cinematic choreography is outstanding.  The acting is superb. The direction is stellar. What can I say? I. Loved. This. Film.

Without giving too much away, and possibly spoiling your own cinematic enjoyment, this story is a rare beauty – it’s full of internal struggles, but in the end, love conquors all – and we all know what a naughty romantic I am.

 

Double thumbs-up from Ms. Black goes to Tamo I Ovde
Neve Black

Orgasmic

orgasmic

Doesn’t the image above make you want to…well, you know…doesn’t it make you feel…well, you know… like purchasing a copy of your own book?

Rachel Kramer Bussel, our editor and chief Orgasm Eroticist has set up a blog page here to promote and celebrate the release of Orgasmic Erotica for Women.

I’m honored to have a story pressed between the dirty, dirty pages of this book with many of my erotic writers and friends.

Oh, and be sure and let me know if you’re looking for a great excuse to head to the Big Apple in late October. Hmmm…maybe you’d like to join me there for an orgasm…? Rachel has set up a special reading to celebrate this…well, this… orgasmic endeavor at The Happy Endings Lounge on Thursday, October 21st. Oh, and just in case you might not know…that’s just around the corner from my birthday. Many happy NYC orgasms to me.

 

Neve Black

Blue Skies…Nothing but Blue Skies

Okay, so I’m a little tired of hearing my boo-hoo’ing over the perils of the jacked-up working world.  You must be tired of feeling sorry for me by now as well.  Hell, I’ll figure out what I’m supposed to be doing. Plus, this pussy-cat always seems to land on her feet. So until I get things sorted out, I plan to keep on writing. And I plan to lick each bowl I find clean with my long and delicious, warm and prickly-tickly, pink and wonderful, tongue … oops, I think I got a bit carried away there with the licking, didn’t I?

Where was I? Blue skies….oh yes, yes, yes, now I remember. I’m also planning to watch some great films at my very own, fully air-con, dark and dreamy-like, Cinematheque.  MEOW!

For example, here’s what’s playing this week…oh, and it might be double-feature flim night for me on Saturday:

coconuts

That’s Groucho and Harpo Marx in the fun-filled, film, Coconuts. Plays at the Cinematheque on Saturday, July 10th at 5:30 PM.

Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough. Either he’s dead or my watch has stopped. Humor is reason gone mad. Before I speak, I have something important to say.  Groucho Marx

And then…playing directly afterwards @ 7:30 PM:

here-and-there

HERE AND THERE/TAMO I OVDE

Serbia/USA/Germany, 2009, Darko Lungulov

A down-and-out NYC saxophonist enters into a business agreement with a Serbian acquaintance: for $5,000 the American will travel to Belgrade, marry the Serb’s girlfriend, and bring her back to New York. But not all goes as planned… Winner of the prize for Best New Narrative Filmmaker at the 2009 Tribeca Film Festival, this deadpan, Jarmuschesque comedy-romance is one of the year’s delightful surprises. With Cyndi Lauper.

Blue skies..nothing but long, leisurely licks, film and blue skies -
Neve Black

…and so…

Neve, after that last blog posting…what the hell now…?

Based on my last blog post over the outsourcing nightmare I’ve suddenly awoken up to, I’m going to ride this psycho-circus, merry-go-round ride a little longer before I jump off the painted pony, which feels more like an evil stallion, and escape from the madness.

I have a few more months of pain to endure: the house I’m rehabbing is, well…let’s just say, there’s been a lot done, thus far, but there’s a lot more that needs to be done too. And its needs take money. Ironically, my desire to live debt-free has a big price tag. That price tag sometimes feels like I’ve sold my soul to the devil – working for a company that I’m choking on, because of its moral and ethical culture is so misaligned with my own. I’m trying like hell to get myself into a position that offers me more freedom to be a lot more choosey when it comes to my next job.

Bless me father for I have sinned: my penance is doing whatever I can for those people I work with that have been exploited for the almighty, fucking dollar. Dear God. Dear Universe: you know I’m doing what I can.

But what’s next for Neve after my plot to escape over the barb-wire fence of the circus? Well, that narrow escape will certainly not be unscathed, and one of my best friends and confidants thinks I should write an essay about this experience. He’s smart and he knows me. He has good advice and this is probably something I will tackle, because fuck’s sakes, I really have to get it out – my blog post was just the tip of this jacked-up situation. This shit sits with me all the time, like undigested meat rotting away in the pit of my stomach.

So, then what’s next after the essay, Neve? (I talk to myself a lot). Well, I’m going to continue studying my love for language; I start school again late summer. My goal is to work for an organization that is better aligned with my own moral and ethical compass. And hell, I really want to make a difference in people’s lives. What a concept.  I want to feel good about my job; to respect its people, and to respect the organiation’s culture as a whole. And if I didn’t realize this before, I know now more than ever – that this nightmare of a situations really weighs heavy on my heart and my soul and I will think twice if and when the devil comes knocking.

 


Neve Black – writer, lover, sinner…working toward absolution -