Huh? What did you just say?

You can blame today’s blog message on Alison Tyler’s blog message from yesterday. It was actually a message that she had received; a simple word, and this one particular word caused quite a stirring. So much so that its had me obsessing about unusual words; uncommon words in my repetoire.

Adding new words into my already existing and somewhat limited vocabulary is a never ending process. I’m always using the thesaurus; searching for just the right word to precisely describe how one of my characters feels; pinpointing that emotion. I think it’s my job to find the perfect words; combine them into sentences; paragraphs, passages, like a symphony of letters. Oooh. I like that.

Anyway, I found a website that had an alphabetical list of words that are extremely uncommon (well, for me anyway) and I thought I’d share just a few of them with you. No worries. There won’t be a quizz later; asking you to give me the laymen’s term description of each word. I’ve added those as well.

Just for fun though, try adding one of the words listed below into an everyday sentence, and then send it to me via your comments.

Cacoethes = A bad habit, or insatiable urge.

Cagamosis = A unhappy marriage.

Callipygean = Having shapely buttocks.

Capernoited = Slightly intoxicated, or tipsy.

Cheiloproclitic = Being attracted to a person’s lips.

Colposinquinonia = Estimating a woman’s beauty based on her chest.

Domptuese = A woman who trains animals.

Floccinaucinicinihilipilifincation = The categorizing of something useless or trivial.

Gambrinous = Being full of beer.

Graphnologia = Having the urge to stare at obscene pictures.

Gymnophoria = Having the sensation that someone is mentally undressing you.

Hippopotomonstrostesquipedalian = Pertaining to extremely long words.

Krokolibidinous = The act of staring at someone’s crotch.

Lygerastia = A condition of one who is only amorous when the lights are out.

Here’s my attempt:

Feeling both gambrinous, and capernoited, I was embarrassed at getting caught krokolibidinous, however I felt they were gymnophorias.

The word tags above can be purchased here via Etsy.

Love Letters In Your Box

I don’t about you, but I love getting a handwritten letter, a note, or a card in the mail from someone. Usually my U.S. mail box is filled with things like bills, and boring mail that I don’t really need or want.

Then by pure happenstance, I’ll open my mail box; retrieving the mail; peering inside and pull out a treat. Suddenly, I’m filled with zeal holding a handwritten envelope; addressed to me from someone who thought I was worth their time. That person sat and jotted down their thoughts; they bought a very expensive postage stamp and then they drove around looking for a mail box.

Warm and tingly is what I feel when I receive mail like that. I think I’m going to start saving all the letters, to include the envelopes.

All the great romances of our time seem to begin with letter writing. I’m gushing with romantic thoughts as I type this blog today. Nearly every Jane Austen story intertwines a letter written secretly to someone; sent by hand delivered courrier. The contents of the letters are often detailed thoughts about a coveted love, a clandestine affair and quite often, the love is unrequited.

Here’s just a few lovers who penned love letters: Napolean Bonaparte and Josephine De Beauharnais; Elizabeth Barrett Browning and Robert Browing; John Keats and Fanny Brawne. God, do I love a sappy, good romance that ends with sweaty, knees shaking, lighting a cigarette sex.

I’m starting to write another story about on-line dating; more specifically the romance in the e-mail correspondence between my two characters. Lets face it, we live in the world of instant gratification; the internet is our best friend. We’re a society that has surpassed receiving hand delivered love notes, and we barely use the U.S. Postal Service anymore. It’s so much easier to pay your bills, and type out your requests and responses via e-mail, even blogging and then hitting the send key on your PC keyboard.

I’d like to know what your thoughts are about the wide spread epidemic of on-line dating. I’d also like to know more about the communication piece; the love letters, disguised as e-mails written back and forth between two people. Does it conjure up a romantic image for you? Do you think that some day, centuries from now, someone like me will be speaking of the on-line e-mail message as the greatest love letters ever written, the same way I refer to the hand delivered letters in two paragraphs above? Do you have any on-line dating experiences to share? You do? Cool. Please do.

Thank you in advance for your comments.

p.s. The love letter mail box necklace above can be purchased via Etsy here.

George Carlin

I can remember when I was a (insert one or a combination of the following; conjugate as necessary) shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cock-sucker, muther-fucker, tits little girl and George Carlin was the comedian making headlines at that time . He’s just slightly younger in age to both my parents, but boy, his humor kept them generationally apart. My older siblings really liked him though, especially my brother.

Here’s what Wikipedia had to say about the late and great George Carlin: George Denis Patrick (born May 12 , 1937 ) is a Grammy -winning American stand-up comedian , actor , and author. Carlin is especially noted for his political and black humor and his observations on language, psychology, and religion along with many taboo subjects. Carlin and his ” Seven Dirty Words ” comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S.

He died too young, and I will never forget those seven words that were (still are not) not allowed to be said on television. Once again, those seven words are:

Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cock-sucker, muther-fucker, and tits.

Weather Related Bad Moods?

The picture above is called, Evening Mood, and I love it. You can purchase this print via Etsy, by selecting here.

I saw a film this weekend (my weekends from my non-writing job are Thurs/Fri), and it was foreign; subtitled and, oui, oui, French. A very fetching film genre for Neve Black, I suppose.

There was scene when one of the characters is driving, his name is Paul with his fiancé’ through the streets of Paris, and it’s raining; steadily pouring actually and the couple are having a heated argument.

Anyway, Paul says to his fiancé’, “It’s funny how the weather really affects my moods.”

Those words he said stuck with me. I think Paul feltit was okay to use the bad weather as an excuse for his belligerent, badgering and overall bad behavior toward his fiancé’.

Paul happened to be a real prick. Fortunately, his fiancée ended up dumping him like a bad habit. Actually, her character was rather kick-ass about dumping his bad weather affects my mood, sorry ass ways, but she went after him with a shot gun. Nothing like my daisy rifle, no sir, it was the real magilla.

You go, French, girl, you go!

Why did I bring this up, you ask? Well, there is a point. You see, I read an article awhile ago, and it spoke of men’s moods. More specifically it spoke of when a woman should approach a man for certain things, based on his mood behavior. Like mood time zones. I was irritated after reading the article, and never thought about blogging about it, until after I saw this film.

As an example, the article suggests waiting to ask a man to take the garbage out between the hours of mood zone A and mood zone B, because his mood time zone will be more open to receiving your trash direction.

Right-e-fucking-o.

I’m scratching my head in bewilderment over the utter lunacy and preposterous idea of mood bahavior zones…. For fuck’s sakes, who can, or would actually live like that? The whole idea gave new meaning to the word, accomodating. The article must have been tongue-in-cheek somehow; written with satire in mind. But it wasn’t and I felt like maybe I was missing out on something. Missing out on some hidden truth of understanding how to communicate with a man.

I found myself pondering the idea, and wondering, “Is it me?” Could it be possible that there are women who really do check their watches; lining up the man in their life’s schedule to their “to do lists?”

I’ve decided to go ahead and paste the article below, for everyone to read. I’m interested to hear from you if this article has some warranty to it, or if it’s bullshit.

Might I just add one more point, please? Thanks.

I think it’s interesting that this article is geared toward men and not women. As if to suggest women aren’t susceptible to mood swings brought on by things like, weather, menstrual cycles, or the sometimes not so lovable men we share our life with.

Hmmm….

If you need his help moving, fighting, or fixing something…
Ask: from 9-12 a.m.
It should come as no surprise that guys wake up bursting with testosterone. And aside from the obvious frisky factor, this surge in hormones makes him ambitious and determined, says Lichterman. This is the perfect time to ask him for a favor, particularly one that makes him feel like Mr. Fix-It. Buying a car? Indulge his competitive streak, and drag him along to help you haggle with the salesman and score a great deal. Or, cash in on his peak in spatial thinking and ask him to move your couch, or measure your closet space. He’ll feel heroic, and you’ll reap the benefits.

Neve comments:
Are you up for robbing a bank today, honey?

If you want to get him to agree to your plans…
Ask: from 3-4 p.m.
Trying to convince him to sign up for ballroom dancing lessons, commit to your new book club or otherwise agree to do something that would normally send men screaming in the opposite direction? Then this late-afternoon window is the perfect opportunity, says Lichterman, since his super-low testosterone levels will make him mellow and amenable to pretty much anything you throw on the table.

Neve Comments:
No offense to any dancers out there, but ballroom dance lessons? Or a book club? I think this tactic might fall under the category of coercion. And that’s no good regardless of the time of day. Right?

If you want to broach a touchy topic…
Ask: from 8-10 p.m.
At this hour, another hormone called oxytocin — a.k.a. the “cuddle hormone” due to its intimacy-inducing effects — is on the rise in his bloodstream, says Lichterman. That means this is a prime time to resolve a lingering spat (“It hurt my feelings when you didn’t call today”) or get a grievance off your chest (“Will you please shave your goatee?”). You’ll probably get met with nothing but a sincere apology and the promise to change his ways. Sure, his sweetness may be as much due to timing as a true desire to please, but hey, who cares as long as your wish is his command?

Neve Comments:
Damn. I’m not sure about anyone else, but I’ve had some real doozy fights on more than one occassion with my love interests at this time of day. Sincere apology? Piffle.

Project Down Under

Please feel free to select here to read my latest story written for Literotica’s, contest about Nude Day.

Don’t forget to vote and please send any feedback. I’m currently sans editor, so this story didn’t get that second pair of eyes prior to submission. A little scary.

Have a great one

Damage Control for Unhealthy Habits

Sorry for the late blog today. I put the finishing touches on a story and submited it to Literotica, so once it’s up on their site, I’ll link the story from here. I’d be interested to get your feedback on this one. I wrote this story without an editor; free-fall writing.

I have some great news to share with everyone. Not only did I read this week that scientists have discovered, not just one, but possibly two new planets; orbiting around our galaxy. These two planets have some of the same characteristics as earth….No. I’m. Not. Kidding.
Isn’t that cool?
And, here’s more great news: I also read an article titled, “Damage Control for Six Unhealthy Habits”; blog title above. So, I took that as a gift from the universe to mean we can still keep on doing all the really nasty and bad things to our bodies, because there’s a serum to make it all better again. And lets not forget there’s two new planet earth’s we can potentially live on now after we’ve completely obliterated the current planet earth.
Ponder this thought, if you will: In the game of golf, a do-over shot, is referred to as a mulligan. Do you think a planet earth do-over would also be called a mulligan, or do we call it something else?

Anyway, I’m only going to comment on the last two unhealthy habits, in the article, only because they’re applicable to my blog, and my personal bests. Ahem; I mean favorites:

The Mistake: Unprotected Sex
You’ve had more than a few sexual partners—and you often skipped the condom.
Gulp. Bad, bad, pussy-cat.

The Expert:
Dr. Jeanne Marrazzo, medical director of the Seattle STD/HIV Prevention Training Center.

The Damage:
Having unprotected sex puts you at risk for HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases—and the more partners involved, the greater the risk.
Damn. I hate that!

Unprotected Sex: Damage Control
“While the incidence of HIV remains low in the U.S. in many populations, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recently recommended that all adults be tested for HIV at least once. This is an excellent opportunity to get that done,” says Dr. Marrazzo. Free tests are available at many clinics and community organizations.
Beyond HIV, our expert recommends a blood test for anyone who hasn’t been vaccinated for Hepatitis B or anyone with recurring genital rashes or sores (often the result of a very common sexually transmitted infection called genital herpes). “If a person is in his or her 30s and has no genital symptoms, I would not recommend routine testing for other sexually transmitted infections, like chlamydia or gonorrhea,” says Dr. Marrazzo.
As for guaranteeing your future sexual health, our expert recommends finding a good health care provider with whom you can comfortably and openly discuss any of your concerns. Or maybe just hooking up with one sexual partner for awhile until the scientists who found two more earth planets, find a cure for all our STD’s.

The Mistake
: Heavy Drinking
In college you majored in drinking and your bar-hopping habits didn’t stop on graduation day.
How did they know that?

The Expert:

Dr. Mark L. Willenbring, director for the division of treatment and recovery research at the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism

The Damage:
“Risky drinking is defined as more than four drinks a day for men or three for women on any given day, and more than 14 drinks for men or 7 for women in a typical week,” according to Dr. Willenbring. “Exceeding this daily limit even 12 times a year places the drinker at increased risk for alcohol use disorders, alcohol abuse, and alcohol dependence. Of course, the impact of drinking to excess differs according to an individual’s mental health history, family history, and personal experiences: “If a parent or sibling is dependent on alcohol, a person’s risk of developing dependence increases by a factor of 2 to 4 times,” says Dr. Willenbring. The good news is that “many people who drink excessively in their 20s incur no lasting damage.”
Huh? What if you’re excessively drinking in your 30′s, 40′s, 50′s and higher? When does the damage set in? Did I miss something? I read and re-read the above; learning what defines a heavy drinker, but I’m confused as to why it’s so bad to drink so much?

Damage Control:
Former heavy drinkers and binge drinkers (defined as males who consume upwards of five drinks and women who consume upwards of four drinks in a two hour period) should “initiate a personal health promotion program focused on diet, exercise, sleep, and social support,” says Dr. Willenbring. This should include learning new behaviors to fulfill the same purpose that drinking once served. Reformed social drinkers, for instance, might satisfy their desire to interact with others by enrolling in a community class or a recreational sport. Those individuals who used alcohol to self-medicate during times of stress might search for a relaxing new hobby like yoga.

The goal is to promote well-being and self-confidence. Dr. Willenbring concludes, “Remain vigilant. Know how much and how often you drink and why.”

Neve Question:

What do call a recovering binge drinker that gets together with an unprotected sex offender?

Prize goes out to the best answer.

Stray Pussies

“Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, Oooh,

Black and orange stray cat sittin’ on a fence

Ain’t got enough dough to pay the rent

I’m flat broke but I don’t care

I strut right by with my tail in the air

Stray cat strut, I’m a ladies’ cat,

A feline Casanova, hey man, thats where its at

Get a shoe thrown at me from a mean old man

Get my dinner from a garbage can

Yeah don’t cross my path

I don’t bother chasing mice around

I slink down the alley looking for a fight

Howling to the moonlight on a hot summer night

Singin’ the blues while the lady cats cry,

“Wild stray cat, you’re a real gone guy.”

I wish I could be as carefree and wild,

but I got cat class and I got cat style.

Written by The Stray Cats

Why did I choose to blog about stray pussies, and paste The Stray Cat Strut into my blog today?Maybe it has something to do with the statistical fact that there are 60,0000 stray cats living on the streets of Cleveland, Ohio. I think those numbers are staggering and sobering. I didn’t just make that number up either, I did some research; that number comes directly from the Animal Protective League.

Maybe my blog today has something to do with the fact that I’ve already taken in not one, but two; two stray cats off the streets; giving them a nice home, and lots of love. Maybe, just maybe it has something to do with the fact that I’ve been recently introduced to a third stray cat, and yes, she’s currently living in a confined space in my house after going to the Vetrinarian Doctor to to be tested for minor things like, Feline AIDS, and Feline Leukemia. Fortunately, she’s healthy. Yes, she’s a female, so that meant she would have to be spayed also. That major operation was done on Thursday; she is resting and healing as I write.

Of course it’s not these poor defenseless animals fault; its the bad judgment and lack of responsibility of their owners. People that move away; leaving their pets behind to fend for themselves, or perhaps someone’s pee-sized brain doesn’t think it’s natural to spay or neuter their pet, so they let them run free; free to procreate and contribute to the already epidemic conditions of animals that live without homes. I’m fucking sorry, but there’s nothing remotely romantic nor erotic about watching some poor animal eat from a garbage can; later to die a slow and painful death because it was poisoned.

Furthermore, I’m not the only bleeding heart in my neighborhood that’s taken in strays. One of my best friends (a once non-cat lover) took in a stray last Spring; this one was pregnant and she had to make the decision to abort the kittens. Can you imagine? It was difficult enough to find a home for one cat, let alone a litter of kittens. The decision she had to make, tore her up inside. She ended up adopting this cat, affectionately now known as, Lena-Felina.

Another fabulous couple I know that live in my neighborhood, and happen to own one of Tremont’s best bars; the fun and funky, Literary Cafe. They have at least six cats currently living between their house, and the bar below. Yep. All pussies were once living on the streets of Cleveland, Ohio.

If I sound a bit pissed off, it’s because I am pissed off. I swear if I find out about one person that doesn’t take responsibility for their animals, I will take them out and personally shoot them with my daisy rifle; slowly, and painfully; ridding the pariah from society. Think I’m kidding? I’m not.

Please be kind to all God’s creatures and take care of them; be respectful and help keep them safe and protected. For the love of God, spay or neuter your animals, because it’s the single most loving thing you can do for them and others around you.

Comments?

Button above can be purchased here via Etsy.

HostelBookers, BookerHookers and HostelHookers

I’ve mentioned on more than one occassion that I’m traveling to Italy in September. Upon the recommendation of someone I trust (she’s an avid traveler), I booked a hostel in Padua, Italy by using the help of HostelBookers.com .

When I blogged about Italy and HostelBookers.com’s great website, I Neve Black’d their website’s name, just a bit and chose to call it, Hostel Hookers. That was the name of the blog title that day too.

It’s important to say, HostelBookers’s website is awesome.

The convenience offered by going to one website for all your hotel accomodation needs is super-duper easy, which saves you time and money. They don’t charge you any booking fees either and they have thousands of inexpensive hostels to choose from; offering valuable information on each hostel. For example, hostel/train station proximity, room rate charges, and how the hostel has rated with other travelers, to name a few. Let’s face it, this type of information is much appreciated when you’re traveling to foreign lands.

This past week, Ben, the editor of HostelBookers.com sent me an e-mail message about my Hostel Hooker’s blog title. He’s come up with a clever replacement title; Hooker Bookers. I may have met my match, eh?

Anyway, I’ve cut and pasted his message below. I feel like a celebrity; Neve’s gone International.

“Hi Neve,

My name’s Ben Cooper and I’m the Editor at HostelBookers.com (and the newly launched/relaunched HostelBloggers).

I just thought you might like to see my response to your ‘Hooker Bookers’ post: http://www.hostelbloggers.com/hostelbookers/2008/06/a-possible-change-of-tack/

How are you getting on in Florence, by the way?

All the best, Ben”

If you’re planning a trip abroad and want to save a bit cash, try booking your accomodations with Hostelbookers.com. Please tell Ben, Neve sent you. ;-)

Ciao

Sexy and Talented

You know what’s it like when you’re really looking forward to seeing a performer once you learn they’re headed into town? That’s how I felt when I found out Anat Cohen was making her debut performance at Cleveland’s finest Jazz night club, Nighttown.

I’ve been following the works of Ms. Cohen; listening to her play clarinet on satellite radio and NPR’s Jazz station. She’s writes and performs the kind of compelling music that if you’re in your car driving, you simply must pull off to the side of the road; turn the dial up and just listen; letting her music transport you to another place.

Anat started playing music in Tel Aviv, Israel where she grew up. Studying tenor saxophone, playing music seems to be in Anat’s blood, as both her brothers, are also acclaimed horn players. After entering Thelma Yelin High School for the arts, she majored in Jazz. After graduation, she played tenor saxophone in the Israeli Air Force Band. She went on to study at the acclaimed Berklee Music School in Boston; exposing her to music from around the world. It was at Berklee that her teachers encouraged her to play the clarinet.

As I sat with my friends last night at Nighttown; enjoying a nice dinner and bottle of wine, a woman with long, silky tendrils of rich, dark brown hair; framing her expressive, deep brown eyes, and olive skin asked if she could sit down at the open seat at our table. She was wearing all black, except for a very tiny diamond nose ring. She emanated that certain je ne sais quoi; she was delightful, and beautiful. She wanted to know if we would somehow be bothered sitting so close to the musicians…my mind raced, “Oh, you’re you. You’re her. You’re Anat.”

“No. We’re elated; thrilled, excited to sit so close.” We chimed in.

“Great.” She said, speaking with a pronounced Israelian accent, as she smiled; exposing dimples and charm. “Would you mind if I sat down with your for awhile. I’m afraid I’m a bit jet-lagged; just coming back from a visit to Israel.”

“Oh, of course, please do. Would you like a glass of the wine we’re drinking?” We inquired.

“Aaaah. No. I need coffee.” She said and at that moment, as if on cue, someone delivered her a coffee from Starbucks.

“So, what was the one thing that made you want to become a musician?” I piped up, wanting to know what made this exotic and captivating woman tick.

“Wow. The journalists don’t even ask me that question.” She said smiling at me.

“Hmmm…well, let me rephrase the question. Did you decide to pursue music because of something you heard, or maybe it was something you felt?” I asked again.

“I think it has more to do with the fact that my family played; it was a family practice. There was a music teacher that lived close by; friends and family would go and have music lessons and I started going also.” She said, remembering while she sipped her coffee.

“Oh. Were those saxophone lessons?” I inquired.

“No. It was piano.” She said.

Ms. Cohen sat with us for quite awhile and we spoke of where she lived (N.Y.C.), various musical instruments and the on-going troubles with plane travel these days. I felt as if we’d known her for awhile, but we only just met that evening.

It was time for the band to start and as expected, she and her band wowed us with every piece; playing for over 1.5 hours. I sat in my chair; eyes closed; as every pore in my body took in the music. The Nighttown crowd loved her band’s performance and applauded until they came out again and played another piece.

I’ve had the pleasure of hearing and meeting a number of very talented, emotionally moving and down to earth musicians since living in Cleveland. Anat Cohen is at the top of my list. As a special treat to yourself, go and hear her perform, and if that’s simply not possible, buy one of her four CD’s, by selecting here. Trust me, you will thank me later.

Shalom.

Summer Soltice

If you live in the Northern Hemisphere, summer officially began at 7:59 EDT on Friday, June 20th. “Summertime and the livin’ easy.” Sublime.

What’s not to love about summer? What reminds you of summer when the days are longer; stretching out into warm and breezy; welcoming, summer evenings?

The warm, summer weather conjures up thoughts of getting naked (shocker) and a little crazy with a friend, or friends, while sipping on a refreshing glass of white wine; filled with tastes like, nectarines, peaches, honeysuckle, lavender and ocean breezes. I can drink a really cold beer too in the summer, or any time for that matter, but there’s something much more appealing and erotic about the description of a chilled glass of white wine that one drinks on a warm, summer day or evening.

There’s wine and then there’s song -

There’s certain types of music that remind me of summer too. I won’t bore you with a long, diatribe of Neve’s favorite summer songs, but there are some songs that I hear and suddenly I’m naked again; laying on my back, looking up at the sky and creating characters out of big, puffy clouds.

So, for me, the common Summer Soltice denominator is being naked; drinking something, cool, and wet, while music is being played.

Aaaaah. Hello summertime. Glad to see you again.

Comments?

p.s. The picture above can be purchased here via Etsy.